Two years ago to the day at the time of writing, I made a decision, in what was initially an attempt to seize back some control. The months and years that have transpired since could be best described as a continuous awakening; I could never have imagined the significance that such a choice would have on my life and the direction it would take thereafter. A powerful jolt from the universe that shook every fibre of my being, allowing for the realisation to dawn that in this stunning masterpiece that is my life, I am the artist, and I alone hold the brush.
A truly sobering realisation, I guess you could say.
In times where we feel the urge to take stock, to reflect on what has gone and contemplate over what is yet to come, in order to help us come to a decision as to the direction in which we wish to continue, the most empowering truth we carry with us, is that we are in complete control.
Indeed, by coming to this realisation I was able to experience profound growth, which has been incredibly nourishing and important for my journey, but it wasn’t something that happened overnight. Often the answers we seek are closer to home than we think; I would encourage you, dear reader, to look inward, and consider the path that you are on and the direction in which you are headed, and ask yourself if there any areas in which you’d like to change, or improve upon. This is quite a powerful practice that we can engage upon at any point in time, and at any stage of life; granted the desire to make such changes generally stems from an endured difficulty of some sort, but we don’t necessarily have to wait for something bad to happen in order to take stock and reflect. Quite the contrary.
I won’t say that it’s been 2 years of clear sailing either. There have been many solitary moments where I’ve been left pondering the direction in which I’m headed, and moments where I’ve doubted the decisions made along the way; I’m sure this self-doubt will always be there. I suppose that’s just all part of the journey, and self-doubt as we know, can be an incredibly powerful tool in itself.
Of course, the people with whom we cross paths play an important role also. Consider those who have joined us along the way thus far; some stay with us for long periods, while others may just make a cameo appearance; all making their own contribution before departing over the horizon, headed for distant shores elsewhere. Those who do cross our paths do so for a reason; the effect may not always be positive, and it may not always be lasting, but it is always important for our journey. Some may even directly question your values and reasoning, in an attempt to test your resolve. In times such as these, you may find yourself questioning your decisions; you may even be tempted to act in such a way that disagrees with your better judgement, but you mustn’t waver.
As night descends and your head hits the pillow, the most important thing above all, is that you can say to yourself with all honesty that you acted in accordance with your true essence; that the decisions you made on that day were made with your greatest intentions upon tuning in to your intuition and listening to the signs presented to you; that you can rest peacefully in the understanding that you have become further acquainted with your element; that the fire within that guides you along your path continues to burn bright.
There is a battle of two wolves inside us all. One is evil. It is anger, jealously, greed, resentment, lies, inferiority, and ego. The other is good. It is joy, hope, humility, peace, love, kindness, empathy, and truth. The wolf that wins? The one you feed.
– Cherokee Proverb
Ultimately, our fate is in our hands; the trail we blaze is ours alone and we have to live with the decisions we make. Understand that which you can control, then look within and find the energy that guides you; act in such a way that makes your soul ignite, and don’t make any apologies if and when you do decide to go in search of something more over the horizon. Pick up the brush, and begin to paint your own masterpiece; feed the wolf that nourishes your soul.